Living in Joy In An Uncertain Reality
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| Rameswaram, South India |
My Friend and I recently returned from an incredible and metamorphic holiday in South India. We came back aglow with millions of experiences of joy, happiness, laughter, simple annoyances, a few ups and downs, forgiveness stories, long philosophical and spiritual discussions, lots of good food, plenty of beautiful people, (and not-so-beautiful ones too), different cultures, sunshine, cold and rain and, most important, an uncertain reality of pending death .... basically living the whole gamut of an ideal normal life to its fullest, surrounded by all the elements of nature - planes, hills, forests, lakes and seas variously. What could be better than this??!! Is'nt this what a Soul aspires to? Our heart's desire is to live an ideal and joyful life. We were doing it even if it was for a short while. It brought home to us that such a life is possible if we stay in a state of heightened conscious awareness.
We are in awe of Life, of God, and all of Creation. We had both wanted to do some deep inner exploration away from the usual hustle and bustle of life and so we planned it about six months ahead. It was an 18 day trip - pretty long for common folks to be away from home - but we were fully and lovingly supported by our husbands as we set out on our our Joy Trip!! It was not the typical "spiritual" thing that involved living in ashrams, yoga and all things religious. We were just two women wanting to unleash our inner Goddess .... and when Goddesses are having a time of their lives how can God be far? We are both comfortable talking about God as our everyday Reality. I know many people are not but, we certainly are very okay with it. So, God was invited too and He showed up in zillions of ways teaching us new lessons. He loves to be invited into our lives. 
Chotty and I reconnected after about twenty-odd years and we picked up seamlessly where we left off so long ago. It felt like we made some secret Soul agreement to reconnect after 'x' number of years and run off to the hills just for a lark!!! We were so ready for an adventure of a lifetime. I had the most heart warming and wonderful time with her and her husband while I was at their home. She has a beautiful home which I loved so much. It's warm, loving and full of good energy. Plus she is a great cook. Plants are her love and she takes great care nurturing them. Her home is surrounded by greenery in abundance. She lives in a gated colony which has huge roads and I love how her dog, Rocky, leads you to the main gate when he wants to run off to do his "business".A few days into our trip out of Hyderabad, my friend received news from home that her brother-in-law, Arup, was seriously ill and admitted to the Intensive Care Unit while holidaying in Delhi. When I look back now, it feels so surreal. Without us actually realizing it at the time, it seemed like God decided to Grace us with His take on life! And everything after that was taken over by Him. He kind of gave us a crash course on the life He expects us, His Creations, to live. He was taking care of us as well as taking care of her family through this uncertain period.
We were already in the hills now and suddenly we were not sure what to do because so much uncertainity loomed in the background. The news from my friend's family clearly shook her up a bit and then our spirits dampened quite a bit. What were we supposed to do? Go back home? The idea of cancelling bookings and doing return bookings became a prospect we were not looking forward to. Anxiously we waited for good news everyday. She was upset obviously but, because I was there too, it suddenly became more difficult for her to decide what to do. Generously enough her family encouraged her to stick to our scheduled travel plans. We did so albeit reluctantly. We were still undecided ofcourse. However, in the midst of all of this, I noticed that I was okay with whatever decision had to be taken even though I had been so excited about this trip for months. I was not feeling as bad as I normally would have felt given my own human nature. Even though Chotty by now switched to "surrender" mode, I was sure she would be feeling worse because it was her call to make. She had already started feeling guilty about enjoying herself so much while this emergency family crises was happening back home. Not a very enviable position to be in.
On hindsight, it seemed like all of what was happening was a demonstration of the meaning of life up close and personal. We live in a Realm of many differing realities and we have to learn how to be at ease with each and evey reality we are faced with at any given moment. One is not different from another. Life is not different from death. To understand life one must know about death. So, considering all of that, what was going to happen now? We did'nt know and we could'nt decide.
Her brother-in-law, whom she dearly loved was under observation in the ICU. There was nothing anyone could do but wait it out. A lesson in patience for all and an opportunity to be in a state of constant TRUST in Life.
In major indecision mode, we decided to let God take over. We cast the burden of indecision on His shoulders and we continued on our way to enjoy the rest of the holiday no matter what came up. We made peace with all possible outcomes.
What I learned from this whole experience is that life has millions of realities from which you could choose. Most of our choices are usually influenced by social scenarios and conditioning, but her family appeared to be practical about everything. It was a refreshing change because serious illness and death changes most of our normal thinking to feeling both are bad things to happen to anyone. And so, this was turning out to be one of those rare, "life-informing" experiences where two extreme realities were taking place at the same time.
In the midst of sight seeing, long uphill walks, renewed efforts to get back into yoga asanas, deep breathing in the fresh, clean, unpolluted air, we noticed how each day passed. We were filled with His Grace. All we could do was be in awe of His handiwork and how He was guiding us. It is always God's Will for us to have the best life ever, and, when left in His Hands, Life just moves in an incredible way. Now, God's ideas and ours about what a "best life" means may differ oceans apart, but when you are consciously on the path of Spirit, you learn that every happening or event is an experience, an experience from which we become better and better versions of our self. Its all about accepting His Will for us. As much as it is said in the world that we create our own experiences and we can change it whenever we want, upto a point it is true. We may think we are the drivers of our own reality, but the truth in my heart always feels that everything is allowed to happen as He sees it fit for our own development. It cannot happen if He does not allow it. Our relationship with Spirit is an extremely personal one and God is involved with every minute aspect of His Cosmic Reality. We accepted Life exactly as it was happening in that point in time and as a result we found ourselves sailing along like happy newborns. All the decisions were being made for us, by the way the situation was happening at home. Everything was in status quo. Arup was still in ICU under observation. Every day we prayed with gratitude and resigned ourselves to whatever Life had in store for us all.
No matter what happens in life, our true purpose is to be completely aligned with Spirit and allow Him to work through us. We cannot do anything without Him. This is a complete Truth. Therefore we decided our true "purpose" is to BE in JOY. That's it. There's no good and bad anything. There is only God. Period. There is no God and. ..... There is only God. There is only The Real. I love to keep repeating this Truth because it brings a great sense of security and peace to my heart. It is why we have to constantly choose The Real. Whatever feels "real" for you, that you must do. If it is not the "Real", you will know instantly because it will lack a sense of deep peace. There are literally zillions of realities being played out every moment and God's Love is standing strong and bright behind all the realities waiting for us to crumble the images, ideas and beliefs that stand like walls between Him and us. And as we crawl out from under the covers and shields, we can break free and see every action has a responsibility attached to it - the responsibility to one's self to release and let go all the stories and imaginations of the false, the untrue and the illusion.
So, what did I learn from all of this? In one word: TRUST. Trust God to take care of all your affairs.
To continue the story, our entire holiday went smoothly and with a lot of joy and help and kindness from all those we had the good fortune to meet and interact with (even the unhelpful ones and the greedy ones looking to cheat us). We had to do nothing but live as God would have us live: with joy! When w reached Hyderabad (Chotty's home), the day before I was to leave for my home in Delhi, we got news that this Wonderful Bright Star whom I came to know through the stories Chotty shared with me about him during our Joy Trip, passed on in Delhi. The next day, we all left for Delhi on the same flight as mine.
The only place that Arup can be in is Heaven, Life's True Reality.
The only place that Arup can be in is Heaven, Life's True Reality.
Namaste. Be Real. Be True.
~ Lavina ~
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